Greetings to you all!
I am still so excited about the rediscovery of my blog! Yes, I am that person who remains ecstatic for ages!.. 🙂
The joy of the Lord is my portion forever more!
As I’d mentioned before, my recent posts were all published four years ago and a whole lot has happened since then.
The title of this post suggests that I am may be married or engaged… which is erm.. true to a certain extent.
Let me explain:
The year was 2015 and the month; February. I had this unsettling feeling within me that I had never experienced before. I felt a void that I did not know what could fill it or how it could be filled. I read books, I did yoga (to ‘find inner peace’) but nothing seemed to assuage that deep stirring within me. Whatever seemed to make me happy; the partying, the music and everything else, lost its lustre.
I could not put a finger on what the matter was; I was not depressed, I was not unhappy, everything was going well in my work life and social life; so this feeling was inexplicable.
One night, on the eve of Valentine’s Day, I decided to pray. I never used to pray so this was interesting to me. I knelt by my bedside and said ‘Hi’ to God. There was not much I could say since I did not fully comprehend what prayer was about. Most times I would say The Grace or The Lord’s Prayer and end it at that but that night, I decided to make a personal communication with ‘this God’. Let me clarify that I was not an atheist nor had I no knowledge of God. Indeed I knew of God but I did not know Him at a personal level.
After the salutations, I proceeded to explain that feeling to God as I would to friend or to a therapist. I spoke to God. It felt great. I was not expecting a reply but it felt great. Nothing much changed that night but I felt good. I had a tugging in my heart that whatever this ‘thing’ was; prayer sure did make me feel better about it. Evening passed and morning came. I felt better after talking to God. The following night, I prayed again. I was enjoying my evening chats with God. The disturbing feeling that I had would always be calmed after prayer.
The following month (March 2015), during a friend’s house warming party, a former roommate of mine invited me to her church. I gladly accepted. I was born and raised in Mombasa, Kenya, where I would casually attend church services but I had never attended a church service while in Nairobi – excluding wedding and funeral services – so that would have been a first for me. My heart palpitated at the thought of going to church. When in Mombasa, church attendance was a mere formality for me as my heart and mind would never be in the service. This time round, I was in it. I was drawn to it. The void that I had, I felt that God would know how to go about it. He created me and only He could understand what I was going through.
On 8th March, 2015, clad in my Sunday best outfit (pun intended), I headed to church with an eagerness and deep hunger to know God. It was on that day that I accepted Jesus Christ as my Lord and Saviour. That is the day I said “I do” and I received the life of Christ. That is the day I became a Christian, Mrs. Christ.
“I will make you my wife forever, showing you righteousness and justice, unfailing love and compassion.” Hosea 2:19 NLT
Everything all made sense now; the void I was feeling, the unsettling feeling that I had, was all leading up to my salvation. Christ had been knocking at the door of my heart.
“Behold, I stand at the door and knock. If anyone hears My voice and opens the door, I will come in to him and dine with him, and he with Me.” Revelation 3:20 (NKJV)
I am indeed very happy that God chose me to be His bride. I am honoured that God drew me to Himself.
Let me pose a question(s) to you; are you at a point in life where you feel that nothing is making sense anymore? Would you like to know what a relationship with Christ feels like?
Comment below and we can get talking.
Thank you so much for stopping by!
God bless you abundantly!